A comfort blanket in a sea of thistles
June 1, 2010 at 10:22 pm | Posted in Austin, TSBVI, Yogic Philosophy | Leave a commentIts June! You know what that means.. School’s out for the Summa! It’s almost the end of the school year, which means some of my kids graduate from our school, some of them move to other teachers, and some of them don’t return to our school next year. This June also marks the end of my little sister’s grade school years. She’s graduating from High School! All of this change used to really shake me up, but lately I’ve been starting to find comfort in it.
Lately I’ve been taking a lot of solace in the idea of impermanence. My entire life I have been a pretty fearful little girl. I was afraid of the world. To me, it was a really scary place. I was scared of everything, and change was one of the worst of ‘em. I HATED change. I was (and still am) a big fan of rules. Everyone has rules to follow. And to me, the world would be a much much better place if everyone did follow the rules! (I used to make my mom repeat the “rules” before bedtime every night. Tradition and rules all in one.)
Through this yogic path I’ve been confronted with the idea that “The only certainty in life is that it all changes.” While it was all fine and dandy for my teachers to say, I was not very cheerful when things changed in my own life. Being the pure-blooded Vata girl that I am, any change or transition threw me for such confounding loop! It would almost seem as though my entire life were ending right then and there whenever something changed.
But lately, I’ve noticed a sweet sweet shift. Impermanence, the idea that I once struggled with whole heartedly, has become my ally. My one tried and true and trusted friend. It’s like my own comfort blanket in a sea of thistles. I’ve been able to calm down A LOT (not fully, but hey, I’m human!) by taking comfort in the fact that everything is impermanent.
Lately my knees have been hurting… a ton. It’s just gotten worse and worse and I don’t know what to do at this point. I don’t trust my doctor or the company behind her, nor the health care system for that matter. I don’t really know where to turn to but I am SOO fearful that this knee pain could cause serious trouble down the line. Being a yogi, I’m pretty in tune with my body BUT, being a yogi, I’m pretty specific as to what I want to put into my body (i.e. meds, injections, etc..) to cure it. I’ve been struggling a lot with playing with my diet, my foot patterns, my shoes, my walking habits, my habits during asana practice. I feel like I haven’t gotten a break to just play or walk or practice without constant diligence. I’ve also taken it pretty hard about what that means for the future and my careers.
Luckily, I have faith that things will change. I will not be burdened with knee pain forever because there will be an answer and a treatment plan sometime in the near future. Knee pain will change, relationships will change, the scenes will change, everything changes. Everything. This once fearful of the world girl is suddenly embracing the changes. Having faith that things will change when you’re stuck in a rut, and remembering to cherish each happy moment (because those too change) are some of the most powerful gifts impermanence brings.
I can’t tell you how grateful I am to be able to take comfort in change, and to share it with you.
Namaste!
P.S. Classes at TSBVI WILL be on for tomorrow!
Karma
May 24, 2010 at 11:45 pm | Posted in Austin, Yoga, Yogic Philosophy | Leave a commentThis past Sunday I took a day trip with a dear yoga teacher friend of mine. On the way there and back we were talking about our Karmas and Samskaras. On the way home we were talking about what to teach in our classes and delved deeper into the conversation of karmas. This time, discussing not only what they mean to us and our own karmas, but how we can share our experiences with our students through our yoga classes. During our conversation I became so thankful that I could be sitting in a car with a friend having such a magical conversation. Sharing what I’ve gone through with my students takes me to a level of humbleness that is hard to explain. Collaborating with my dear friend on how we are going to share our experiences with our students in our own ways and bouncing ideas off each other… I can’t even describe how wonderful it is that I get to have experiences like that in my life. Cheers to you love! Hazzaaa!
What I can describe is what the heck these Karmas and Samskaras are!
In yoga we use the work “Karma” a little different from how most of the Western world refers to it. In yoga, the word “karma” refers to one’s habitual patterns. The thoughts and actions that we perform over and over again. They are ingrained in us with almost as much intensity as one engraves carvings in wood. The more you perform this certain karma, the more you carve that line into the wood and the deeper the habit becomes. Our deep carvings or habits are called Samskaras. These are the habits that we can’t seem to shake. We all have them.
Our first step is merely to notice these karmas. What are your habitual patterns? They can range anywhere from sleeping on the left side of the bed to the way you react when someone cuts you off in traffic to how you handle your anger and fear. Karmas manifest themselves in many ways and are different from person to person. Are there ways you automatically react when you feel insecure? When you’re mad? When you’re fearful? Personally, I know that there are specific patterns I tend to follow. Some of them are positive, some of them do nothing but make the situation worse. Are there obstacles that you just can’t seem to get over? Do you notice that they keep coming back, time after time? In yogic theory, these obstacles are placed in the path of your life for you to take notice and learn how to over come them. Most of the time, our mission is to take note of how we act/react when these obstacles appear and try to navigate ourselves in a different pattern. It is also said that your karmas follow you from lifetime to lifetime and that you can begin to reach “enlightenment” only when you have overcome all of your negative karmas.
Luckily for us, not all of our karmas are fixed (Drdha Karmas). For most of our karmas, we can overcome them. The Adrdha Karmas are said to not be fixated within us. They are the carvings in the wood that aren’t too deep to overcome. Some of our karmas are on their way to being fixated but can still be changed (Drdhadrha Karmas).
Naturally, going with the grain is the easiest. Going with what you know, with what you’ve always done, is usually preferred. Even if those actions tend to get you nowhere, or worse, may take you 3 steps backwards from your goal.
What’s a yogi to do?
This is the exact question I posed to my dear yogi friend on our road trip yesterday. She ever-so-smartly explained that just as alcoholics and other addicts must do, the first step is to admit that there is a problem. Touche my friend.
So Yogis, my challenge for you this week is to merely notice what your karmas are. Do you have any Samskaras that govern your life?
If you care to go deeper into this challenge:
Whenever a common habitual pattern is noticed, and it is determined that this karma does not benefit you, the goal then becomes to transform it into a more positive karma. These are established in the same ways that our negative karmas are established: through practice, practice, practice! My personal advice is to stay in the present moment and be grateful for what you have and what you know. All too often, our karmas are created out of fear, which is based on things we don’t know or make up in our minds.
Going against the grain of your typical actions/reactions is difficult. It may seem weird and awkward. Just as it wouldn’t be nearly as smooth when carving into wood. If you suddenly begin to turn your carving knife and create a new, different line, it will feel not as smooth and natural. This is the process of yoga. This is the process of transforming your life.
If you continue to carve that new, positive karma whenever you begin to go down the past route, you will find that over time, the positive karma will be the natural flow for your carving knife, and subsequently, your life.
Namaste.
Kassy
Blog at WordPress.com. | Theme: Pool by Borja Fernandez.
Entries and comments feeds.
